Enjoy your modern ‘Sins’ !

I don’t like the word Sin. It is much rooted in the acting of people. It has become a burden. Even when you think you are free of sins, you take a stand that is based on your education. And this in a non-stop pattern. Most of the idea’s we get as an imprint in our childhood are often centuries old. They are told and learned as part of a longer cultural and family-tradtion. Yes its oftentimes part of the religious believe-system our society is build upon. But its beyond that, also nonreligious families have their moral patterns. Somehow they all share the good and bad principal. You are no good and can become better

 

Its part of your identification. No doubt about it. Even in the world of spirituality I often notice it. Be more open to your feelings, be kind to your environment, live healthy, love your neighbors, help your country, feed the needy and the poor, watch over your body. When you make your first ‘spiritual ‘steps you enter a land full of possibilities to become a better person.

You always need to change to fit in. So you shape your life into several new believe-systems and daily customs. This will make you feel comfortable and excepted. Oh and even then again you can do courses to get rid of your new believe-systems: find your own way, be more like yourself. Be happy.

Still we act like being a non-perfect person, trying to become a better one. And preferably a prefect one. Oh yes, self-realisation is often called similar to being a perfect person. I remember even my teacher* was told by some of his pupils that he had to work on his character. Yeah, no kidding.

 

Acknowledge that you live in Ignorance

 

If there is really something you have to do, oh I hate to say you ‘have to do things ‘, is that you acknowledge that you live in ignorance, not sin. Ignorance IS the only sin. So if you want to know ‘who am I ‘, just realise that you have lived in ignorance longer than your family tree can show. Now you are ready to become awake. Now you want to open your eyes and see. Its your birth-right.

At the same time, realise that you more or less will always divide your life in good and bad. You always want to stand on the good platform to take the right train to the desired destination. It is part of the way you think. You are not so good, not so bright and now you become better or even divine. Well, not divine you will say, because our teachers are holy and no way you can equal your new chosen priest or minister. That is also a joke. By watching your teacher, by listening to him: you are him . You are being him at that very moment! So becoming like him or her is again part of our inborn idea of being not so good.

 

Most pleasures are allowed when we give it a meaning

 

Let me tell you a nice little simple contemporary story about guilt and sin. I heard a few families shared a wonderful holliday-retreat. It’s amazing to be there: nature is inviting to long walks. They agreed upon the fact to have no satelite-tv and a computer with internet-connection in the house. I was surprised: such a wonderful house, so many people enjoying it and no tv or computer. Why’s that? It’s not that it is hard to make it possible. Every house nearby has tv and internet. The reason is that the friends were afraid finding themselves in front of the TV or surfing the internet instead of hiking and reading books.

Basically often the more we enjoy possible addictive but simple things in Life the more we condemn them. Watching tv or surfing the internet, eating fat, sugar, sex, alcohol, reading comic books, visiting a theme park, shopping: we love it and hate it because deep down we are told to become a good person and a good person is not addicted to his pleasures. Most pleasures are allowed when we give it a meaning: we educate ourself, we learn, we make cultural day-trips: we become a better person. It is tv-chef Anthony Bourdain, traveling around the world that always shows how much we enjoy fatty porg-meat over everything else. And he is right. Deep down we do know.

 

Don’t forget to put a good novel with you in your backpack!

 

We all have our imprint of sins. A century ago we were told not to play cards, it’s from the devil. Ladies were not allowed to run: it was not good for them. Oh, and reading? No way, not too long: it would make you lazy and not suited for work when you were of the working class.

Now I often hear: I just watch the evening news on tv, I just check my mail on the PC. No way that I use my tv or PC often. I am way to busy with other outdoor activities like jogging to become healthier. I have to lose weight, I have to become more understanding to my partner, my kids, I have to be this, I have to be that. We are very much busy becoming a better person out of sin.

In fact, we love to watch ‘stupid ‘ tv-series. My teacher* often started his Satsang by sharing his television-experience. He loved movies with Louis de Funes or good soccer-matches. He just had fun with all the modern technology. His house was full with cables pointing to all kind of modern media. He loved it.

You like to watch television, zapping a few hundred stations? Go for it. Want a PC with online-games, an X-box, a Samsung galaxy phone? Having fun with it? Then buy it if you can. Then go for a walk. Turn of your tv and internet first, switch of your phone, forget about twitter and Facebook and enjoy a good hike. Don’t forget to put a good novel with you in your backpack!

 

Depressions can lead to understanding

Q: I suffer from depressions. From the doctor I got medication and I went to a therapists. He advises me to find another job. A workplace that is more to my liking.

A: Why are you telling me this? Come on, what is the reason to bring it up during our talks on the subject ‘ who am I ‘?

Q: Yeah well, I know it might not has to do with this meeting. Sorry.

A: You already brought it on the table. So once again I ask you: why are you telling me this.

Q: Hmm. I have been reading that a depression is just something from the mind. And you are not willing to talk about problems from the mind. But…

A: But what?..

Q: The treatment, the talks with my therapists. You know, they are all meant to help me, but I know for sure that they have nothing to do with life-related issues.

A: How are you so sure they are not?

Q: I can’t find answers in the help my therapist gives me. Sure I agree my current job is not giving me any satisfaction anymore, I surely could do with a new challenge, but I think it’s not the source of my depression. I went on a short holiday to Italy and I had a wonderful time enjoying the sun and the blue mediterranean. Still, so calmed down by the easy-going stay, the food, the culture, my company, a desolated feeling of loneliness and despair didn’t went away. The sea was so blue and the waves so relaxing, that it really was just a matter of time and my depression should have eased. But no, it was there 24/7 and despite I had some great moments in general I got overruled by dark and gloomy feelings.

A: A lot of people suffer from depressions in their lives. Usually it starts so around the age of 35. When we are young we still have our dreams about our future. We have an idea we can become anything, get all the partners we want. The Sky is the limit when we are young. Soon we will settle down in a true believe of building up certain structures to help ourselves survive.

It is very common to build up so-called secure structures between the first half of our lives. With the growing structures we easily lose a majority of our freedom of movement. Our childhood oftentimes gives us more freedom than we ever will find later on in live. I am not talking about possible difficult circumstances: parents divorcing, poverty but even then our future is still so much open to imagination.

Sooner or later our lives become ‘ secured ‘ and the only adventures we might encounter are when we see our lives again through the eyes of our children. In reaction we will question our secure circumstances: we change partners, profession, home and lifestyle. This can happen a few times and most of us are very succesful keeping up a happy life.

People like you in particular become aware that changing life-circumstances might be a good idea, but to give a longterm solution to uncomfortable feelings it is not always the answer.

Q: There are also people who need medication to conquer depression. So it is not always mental.

A: I don’t rule out that this is the case for some people. There are clear phobia’s, and deeper trauma’s. I am not a doctor, and to discuss if medication is a good solution, is not to me. In this answer I am talking about a growing underbelly feeling with no utterly cause that can end up in a serious state of deep depressive mood swings. More and more people Imeet are having problems like you describe. They immediately invite, or better said, urge you to ‘ look inside ‘ and to find out ‘ who am I ‘.

NB. This subject points direct to the question ‘ who am I ‘ . In a follow-up I go deeper into this and will explain you how I had to deal with a long period of depressions.

Where do You want to Wake Up?

Q: The more I listen to you, read books about the subject ‘ who am I ‘ , the more I get attracted to this question of Life. At the same time understanding this matter becomes more difficult. I often feel uncomfortable living my live in regard of the search of who I am.

 

A: Why are you visiting me then? Try to enjoy yourself more. Don’t do things you don’t have to do. Please go, I wish you all the best with your future life, really.

 

Q: No. That is to easy. I have a lot of other activities I prefer , but they don’t come with the deeper uncomfortable feelings I have under the surface. I really look for answers.

 

A: To stop the uncomfortable feelings?

 

Q: No, not just that…

 

A: Yes, just that…you want to be happy, no worries and live your life full and glorious.

 

Q: Ok, sure I want to live a happy life. But the discomfort only goes away when I have answers to it. I really want to know where they come from and where they point to.

 

A: They point to YOU. You neglected YOU. Now Existence is trying to get your attention. Anyway, I have met people in my life that immediately withdraw themselves from the search for Truth. They knew it could be a threat to their cosy lives. Existence really doesn’t care if you acknowledge its ruling part over you. And sometimes enough seems to be enough. So do you think enough is enough for you?

 

Q: No, It’s not enough. I can have fun and enjoy myself, but I simply can’t run away. Not finding answers let me feel restless and unfulfilled. Or do you think it’s so uncommon that I want to know where my hunger for knowledge is leading to?

 

A: Hunger for knowledge: No. I don’t deal in mind-trips. Making it comfortable for you? No! I’m not here to let you hug yourself. The best my appearance will do is that it shows you with yourself. That is my task . If you would like to make me part of your show, than it is to show you to YOU. Don’t forget : Meeting the trees and the forest is already meeting YOU. So meeting ME is meeting YOU. The difference between me and a tree for you is that I use words to point you to YOU. The fact that you listen and ask questions about ‘ who am I ‘ is already a sign that you are waking up.

 

Q: How do you know I am waking up?

 

A: Let me explain it to you in a way that you might get an understanding. It helped me a great deal on my search.

One day I pictured myself sitting in a chair. I feel lazy and give myself over to a little nap. A few times I return to the land of the living, but then it starts. There is some ticking on my shoulder. In my dream it shows itself to be a leak in a roof. There is no house, there is no roof. The tapping on my shoulder becomes more urgent. Suddenly I open my eyes. It’s a whole new setting that appears. Everything is different: the people, the surrounding, my body. Some fellow traveler, looking like a monk in the middle-ages, says to me: come we have to reach Rome before the evening clock will lock us out. We follow our travel, and I leave the former Idea of Life behind in the package of a vanishing dream. Within seconds.

 

Q: I am speechless. Are you telling me that I am slowly getting aware of the fact this is all like a dream?

 

A: You are getting it! It’s so normal that person’s picture themselves in a land of their dreams. For instance you picture yourself in a beautiful home in a wonderful land and all your wishes have come through. That is to say: the Idea’s that you have on a desired life. I say idea’s, because the other part of your Ideals is that you lack fulfilment now. One day the body stops , and the whole objective world vanishes. Then idea’s turn themselves immediately into objects: materialised idea’s so to say. Remember, Consciousness can only understand it self in the manifest! when you always have loved to live in a sunny country along the beach, you might end up in Mogadishu Somalia. The beaches are great, the weather wonderful, but the war and famine ongoing, that was for the fear part of your desires!

My words are just simple. They are just there to let you feel the tapping on your shoulder. Where do you want to wake up?